Flying Monkeys

We’re dealing with serious Creeping Crud here, chez Non Stepford Home, so I figured I’d give you another Memories post, in between my body’s efforts to rid itself of my lungs.

Enjoy!

Now, it so happens, as a homeschooler, you tend to get asked, “Why do you homeschool?” Sometimes its asked of genuine curiousity, even from someone that’s considering homeschooling themselves. Othertimes, its asked from someone whose really just looking to be obnoxious and start a debate or argument. Trust me when I say, as a seasoned homeschooler, you begin to know the difference. The belligerent tone of voice is usually something of a clue, lol!

So, I was recently asked, “Domestic Imp, how do you handle those moments?”

Simple. Flying monkeys.

When someone comes at me in an aggressive tone, looking for a debate, and demands to know WHY I homeschool, I reply, “Flying monkeys.” Sometimes I say this calmly and matter of factly, other times I’ll say it in a fearful tone, scanning the skies in a worried sort of way.

They never ask you anything again. Trust me.

Its sort of a disappointment to me, actually. See, I have this whole scenario worked out in my head, if only they WOULD continue. Goes something like this:
Woman runs, off, grabs a friend, talks to her while wildly gesturing in my direction. Both women then head over to me.

First woman: “Tell her what you said!”

Me, giving a blank stare: “I’m sorry?”

FW: “Tell her what you said about homeschooling and flying monkeys!”

Me, concerned: “Ma’am, are you quite all right?”

Second Woman: “She says you homeschool because of flying monkeys.”

Me, taking a cautious step back from the two women, and eyeing them warily, as if expecting them to suddenly turn into flesh eating zombies,:” Reeeeallly now. How…interesting. Kids? We need to go. NOW!”

FW, getting a bit hysterical: “You did! You said, flying monkeys! You did! You did!”

Just doin my bit to add a bit of interest to a mundane day.

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