Folks have been asking, “How was the move?”
Well, almost a week later, I *think* I can talk about it.
The nasty eye twitch is almost gone. I figure by the time the youngest moves out, I’ll be completely recovered.
First of all, let’s say right up front: packing with two toddlers in the house is like pissing in the wind…except sooner or later, your bladder would be empty.
Toddlers never run out of their ability to completely decimate hours of work in mere minutes.
And they TAG team, people. One distracts, while the other destroys.
If they could ever organize, as a group, we’d all be screwed.
We saw Wolf and Tazzie leave last Sunday.
Thus started the journey through Hell. Boo completely lost his mind, a full on meltdown, the likes of which I’d never witnessed before, and hope never to again.
Cubby, while not giving the shrieking, screaming, full on body tantrum display his older brother did, proceeded to lose his mind whenever I left his sight. It was like having a Cubby shaped backpack, but he was mainly clinging to my leg. A quick bathroom trip, with *gasp* the door closed, and the child was convinced I would never be seen again.
I wrote Wolf a few notes while we were gone. I think they give you a general idea of how the process went.
We all miss you! I love you! Can’t wait til we’re together again!
We may not make it. This shit is NEVER going to get finished. And if you complain, one more time, about how hard driving across Canada is, I swear to God I’m going to tear your balls off. Try packing and cleaning, one armed, with a toddler that loses his shit if I walk out of the room. You planned this, didn’t you? YOU KNEW you were getting the easier part of this.
Do we have any gasoline around? Burning the whole place down would be easier.
I hate you. You’re an asshole. I want a divorce. You get the kids.
After that, I quit writing notes. Mainly because I figured they could be used against me in court…criminal, or a sanity hearing.
We headed to a hotel before catching the bus. It was…delightful.
There was a restaurant in the lobby that specialized in curry and pizza.
Yes. You read that correctly. Curry and pizza.
I have no freaking idea how they came up with that combination, but the children and I opted for burgers from a place across the road.
The delightful smell of curry hit you as you walked in the lobby. Rather like a baseball bat to the face. And it followed us in the elevator, and even into our second floor room.
Bleargh. Even for someone who likes curry, it was overpowering.
Then, it was off to the bus stop in the morning. Where a light sun shower turned into a downpour before the bus showed up. Everything was soaked. But, I did see a double rainbow, which I took as a good omen, even though Diva smugly informed me that a DOUBLE rainbow was a bad, bad thing. That kid learns to keep quiet sometimes, damn it.
The bus ride actually went surprisingly well. They took turns napping, and didn’t lose their minds.
No, they waited until the hotel room for that.
The hotel room was lovely. Two separate bedrooms, connected with a living room and kitchen. Two bathrooms. Honestly, it was far nicer than the House of Horrors we’d left behind.
Frankly, the whole trip was an exercise in what I call, ‘Survival Parenting’. I’ll explain more in a post tomorrow about that, but basically, it’s simply doing whatever needs to be done to ensure everyone survives to the end of the trip. No more, no less.
The plane trip…what a freaking gong show.
Started out with the shuttle being late. And, despite me having been VERY CLEAR about the amount of luggage we had, (and the hotel clerk SAW it when I was booking the shuttle, I even pointed at it) she didn’t tell the shuttle. He was plenty ticked, because we basically filled his luggage area, and he had another six people to pick up.
By the time we hit the airport, it was a track race. By the time we got checked in, luggage checked, and through security, we were already being called to board.
The transfer? Pretty much the same. We were changing the toddlers in the bathroom, and heard our boarding being called.
But, we made it. And have been here almost a week. And Wolf still has all his body parts.
Myself, I’ve been dealing with RSD flare ups, and a migraine from Hell yesterday.
Wolf, “I hope this is just fall out from the move, all the stress, and not from the different weather here. Otherwise, I’ve moved you to Hell.”
Me, “Baby, you take me to ALL the nicest places.”