Wolf and I know we’re outnumbered. I mean, we can count and everything, right?
But every now and then, you FEEL outnumbered, and it catches you by surprise.
Such was the case for Wolf on Thursday.
He was watching a show where it was mentioned that a married couple had heart shaped tattoos on their posteriors.
Turning to me, he said, “Hey Honey…that’s what we can do for our anniversary! Heart shaped tattoos with our names on them!”
I grabbed a Sharpie off my desk (side note: everything ends up on my desk, sooner or later. I expect to find the crew of the Mary Celeste one day, huddled under my desk, surviving on dropped crumbs) and offered to write, “Property of Imp” on his rump.
While he was laughing, I advanced on him with an evil grin. Tazzie was on his one side, Princess on his other. Without my saying a word, they both shifted so that they were sitting in his lap, pinning him to the couch.
I uncapped the Sharpie, and announced, “Actually, if I’m going to declare you as property, it should be where everyone can see it!” then leaned over, and started to write, Property of…on his forehead.
The kids got off his lap, pointing and laughing at him, while Diva chimed in, “I can’t believe you did that! He’s got ‘Property of’ on his forehead!”
“Yeah,” I replied, “I really need to finish that.”
So, the kids all ganged up on him again, Diva included. Wolf discovered, for the first time, that with those three against you, it’s physically impossible to get up and escape.
I finished writing my name on his forehead, and the kids scrambled off of him, laughing.
Wolf, promising revenge and not taking me out for lunch, headed to the mirror to inspect the damage.
He comes back, mock glaring at everyone. I’d used the cap end of the marker to ‘write’ on his forehead, so there was no ink involved.
I’m not sure which rattled him more…that the kids could physically overwhelm him, or that we’d all join forces to pull a prank on him.
Waving the Sharpie, I offered to still give him a heinie tattoo. He fled before the kids could catch him.
That’s OK. I know where he sleeps.